Day 14: Storm

Screen shot weather underground app

The weather map shows a long line of orange and red, surrounding by bright green.  The blue dot that is my town is on the edge of this mass of thunderstorms moving steadily to the northeast about about 20mph.  Though I am hoping one of the storms will wander my way, it seems they will stay to the north of me.

I love storms.  I love the energy they carry, the rain they bring and the scent that lingers when they pass.  It feels refreshing.

It's all too easy of a metaphor - the storms of life and the feeling of release when they pass.  And there is some truth to that, but unlike the storm that is passing near my home now, the storms of life don't often have a handy map with which we can see their approach. There isn't an alarm that will buzz on my smart phone letting me know I should take cover, close the windows and seek safety.

No.  The storms of life often sneak up on us.  They appear seemingly out of nowhere, knocking us down even as we try to run for shelter.  Of course, there are also the storms we live in the midst of for years without being aware of them because, well this is the life we are used to, until we have that moment of calm when we realize that, wait...maybe life doesn't have to be like this.

I feel as though I am on the edge of emerging from the latter; as though I am approaching a place of rest.  Perhaps it is the hopefulness of my approaching vacation - a week away from my life without work, or school, or other obligation.   Or maybe things have just run their course. Or maybe I'm finally starting to get some of this self care thing right and it's actually working.

I know I've a ways to go, but for the first time in ages I'm feeling just a bit hopeful, just a bit more clear headed, and just a bit more like I don't have to run for shelter because I'm starting to build my own inside myself.