Day 10: A Rant

It may be due to my not feeling well and spending most of my day in bed yesterday but today I am feeling totally uninspired as far as writing a blog post.  The card I drew today did not help matters in that it talked about how the universe has our best interests at heart and well, if you know me at all you know that great eye roll that brought about.

I don't think the universe has our best interests at heart.  Of course I don't think it's out to get us either.  I guess if I had to summarize I'd say that the universe operates in a manner of benign indifference.  It's not out to get us, but it doesn't very much care either.

I don't think this is a cynical belief to have. There is still plenty of joy, love, happiness, and celebration to be had in this world even if the universe isn't in the job of producing it.  We are quite capable of producing out own joy, love, happiness and celebration.  We are quite capable of producing our own misery, pain, suffering, sadness too but hey, there is something to be said for balance right?

Now let me be clear, I am not talking about the 'law of attraction' here.  This will produce and even greater eye roll and a scowl from me.  While I think human beings are responsible for most of the joy and suffering in this world, I think that a lot of the time – in fact probably most of the time – shit just happens.  We genuinely have very little control over what happens in the world outside of our own skin. 

Here is what I do believe.  You have control over one thing in the world and that is you.  You have no control over anything else – the weather, the sunrise, or the guy next to you on the train.  Even your children or your loved ones, who you may have more influence with than the guy on the train, in the end you have zero control over them too. 

This is not all as bleak as it may sound, not having control certainly does seem to relieve one of responsibility, right?  No. I actually think it is just the opposite.  I only have control over what I do.  If I want to make the world a better place then I need to live in a manner that does that in whatever form that means for me.  If I had to make a list it might include…

…taking care of myself.

…being generally kind to my fellow humans.

…living in a manner that impacts the planet as little as possible.

…building community.

…speaking up when I see injustice.

…creating beauty when I can.

I'm not saying I'm perfect at any of these things.  I have good and bad days like most of us (and honestly I probably fail far more than I succeed).  I can hope that in living in this way I might inspire others to do the same.  I could even do my best to spread the word about My Super Special Key to a Happy Life but this does not mean that anyone else who hears my all-knowing words of truth is going to follow them and some might even reject them outright.

Yes.  If I am nice to people they are probably more likely to be nice to me.

Yes. If I use less resources there will hopefully be more for everyone.

Yes. If I'm less judgmental then, oh whatever, the world is full of assholes and I don't have any control over them either.

"Now wait a minute here," you might ask, "If you don't buy into this universe has your best interests at heart thing how come you read tarot cards and sometimes write about having moments of connection and a sense of peace…hmmmmph!"

Well, that is a totally different question for a different blog post; one which is not going to be written today.  But just because I can have moments of feeling at one with the universe doesn't mean I think it loves me. 

In any case, it does seem I at least got a good rant out of today's card.