It was a messy night...

"I like the snot to run a little, the tears to accumulate a bit before reaching for the handkerchief. Then I know I'm really crying. Crying just isn't crying unless it's messy." ~Terri Guillemets

Tonight I cried, a lot. And yes, it was messy.

I cried because a friend let me down.
I cried because of grief that I've nowhere to put.
I cried because another friend who truly wanted to help me couldn't.
I cried because I found myself questioning the purpose of my dreams.
I cried tears of sadness, grief and frustration.

Frustration. Frustration. Frustration.

I cried until snot ran out my nose and my contacts were swimming.

And then, after half a pint of peanut butter ice cream and a glass of wine I cried some more.

Now I'm in bed with wet cheeks hoping that when, three and a half hours from now, the dawn arrives and my alarm sounds all will be right again with the world.

I can hope...